By Jeanine Michaels
Pastor Chuck Smith’s wife, Kay, was the force behind one of America’s greatest revivals. In the foreword to her book Pleasing God, Pastor Chuck wrote, “Kay was the first to reach out to the hippies of the ’60s. Her prayers and tears laid the foundation for our church, Calvary Chapel.” But to understand her heart for the hippies, we must start with her story’s beginning.
Kay had less than an ideal start. In 1927, at seven weeks old, she was dropped off at a foundling home after her birth mother, a Hollywood actress, made the tough decision that she could not parent her daughter. By age 14, Kay remained unaware that the couple who ran the home, Oscar and Minnie, weren’t her parents. After her cousin spilled the beans, Kay asked, “Is it true? Am I adopted?”
Minnie and Oscar finally made it legal, adopting Kay. Kay’s relationship with her adopted dad was special. However, Minnie suffered from schizophrenia, resulting in a tumultuous relationship that tended toward cruelty. Minnie never showed affection to her daughter.
At 21, Kay met Chuck, who was well-versed in the Bible, which pleased Kay. After a six-week whirlwind romance, she married Chuck, partly to escape the home where she grew up. Chuck and Kay reared four children together, Janette, Chuck Jr., Jeff, and Cheryl. Though Kay herself had trouble showing affection, she loved fiercely. She ensured that her children never felt the insecurities she had growing up.
Her daughter, Janette, was dating a man who knew Lonnie Frisbee, a hippie who was sharing the love of Christ with his generation. Knowing Kay was desperate to meet a hippie, they invited Lonnie to meet Janette’s parents. Kay and Lonnie connected on a very profound level as he shared his testimony with her. His story touched a place deep inside Kay as she recognized another wounded individual. She ministered to his pain in a way few others could. As Lonnie and his wife, Connie, brought their friends to Costa Mesa, Kay would counsel them for hours, praying with and for them.
The church began a phase of explosive growth, eventually meeting in a large tent to accommodate the people. Kay started meeting with the women to help them grow as godly wives and mothers. Kay began to hold annual Pastor’s Wives retreats as the Calvary Chapel movement grew into a network of churches. She was fondly called “Mama Kay,” which is so poignant.
Kay developed early-onset dementia around the time she turned 60. For a while, she was able to manage her disease. But soon, she had to step away from her duties at the church. Her daughter, Cheryl, with her husband, Brian, returned from England to join the staff of Calvary Chapel to assist Pastor Chuck and Kay.
Chuck preceded Kay in death in 2013. In 2021, Kay died at the age of 94. Kay served alongside her husband faithfully for many years. What a special ministry she had! What Satan meant for evil in Kay’s early life, God used for good as she ministered to others out of her own pain.
Annotation added April 25, 2024:
Per Chuck and Kay’s eldest daughter, Janette, Kay did not have dementia at age 60. She had a thyroid operation in her 70’s and afterward she began to have mild signs of dementia along with occasional focal seizures. She always was spiritually acute and loved to worship, pray, and study the Word. God blessed her with a kind heart— one of the assistant pastors described her as “this big heart walking around Calvary Chapel”— and a love for God and His ways. The “Joyful Life” studies for the women of Calvary Chapel were started by her in the 1970’s to follow Paul’s admonition in Titus 2:3-5 for the older women to teach the younger women to walk in God’s ways. Since she was in her 40’s and had a grandchild, she felt that she qualified as an “older woman”. Her series called “Pleasing God” taken from I Thessalonians 4:1, was taught by her at Joyful Life and became the book by the same name that has five stars on Amazon. That was the first of many books that were taken from her 25 years of teaching the Joyful Life lessons.
SheBelieves Co. 
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